Miryam's Space

Duality Unified. B’haalotcha 5781

Adon olam asher malach; Shechinah ashar Malka;  Hu echad v’ain sheini (Master of the Universe who reigned, Feminine G!dly presence who reigned, is one and not two!)

From Sefer Yetzirah Ten inscriptions:

For the Creator is one

And has no second

And before one,

What are you counting? (translation Rabbi Jill Hammer)

G!d is one, yet also containing feminine and masculine sephirot , or facets, within! G!d is One, not Two, yet there is much duality in the world.  Until now, the song is all I knew of Age of Aquarius! According to Rabbi Lee Moore, who teaches Jewish Trending into the Age of Aquarius, for two millennia we have been in the age of Pisces, which is a very dualistic time, symbolized by two fish swimming in opposite directions. That this is changing, we are entering a new age, G!d willing a kinder and gentler age. Rabbi Moore teaches that we have a role to play with how this will pan out. What can we do to unify conflict and duality?

The parashah this week, B’haalotcha. Has SO MANY dualities, or twos in it, opposing forces. But if you look there is a pathway to one-ness to redemption to be found each time within the text.  

In Chapter Ten, Numbers, there are to be two silver trumpets made. Why two? One trumpet to summon the leaders, Two are played to summon the kahal, the ordinary folks.  And two ways to play the trumpets – the Short blasts for war, which represent brokenness according to Penine Halakhah, Rabbi Eliezer Melamed, The solution: a Tekiyah, a single long blast for peace, for Shabbat.  See Source Sheet linked here

G!d dwells among the people in the wilderness in two forms the cloud covering the Mishkan/Tabernacle, appearing as fire by night. And as long as the cloud could be seen, we’d rest, if not perceived, we broke camp! When we’d break camp (interesting we use “break”!) Moshe would call out Kumah– arise G!d and scatter our enemies.

The resolution? When Moshe would call : Shuv return. And S’forno explained that Shechinah would once again rest with Yisrael

Two prophets ran out (Numbers 11:27) and told Moses, saying, “Eldad and Medad are acting the prophet in the camp!”  Joshua says “restrain them.” The resolution? Moses answers: Would that all the LORD’s people were prophets, that the LORD put His spirit upon them!”

Moses will take a second wife, and both his siblings will criticize him for it, although only Miriam will pay a price.  El Nah Refah nah is the answer, Moshe’s prayer, “Oh G!d, please heal her!”

My favorite though is the law for a Second Pesach, Pesach Sheni (Numbers, chapter 9) You see this law was not originally in the Torah given to Moshe at Sinai.  A group of people who could not offer the Pesach offering approached Moshe and Aharon at the tent of meeting.  It’s not fair, they complained, we want to draw close to G!d too! (Now, you guessed it, there is actually a second time of complaining – “we don’t want manna, we want meat”! with a different motive, that tale has a very different ending.)

This is an appeal to justice and to the desire to approach G!d, and so Moshe says “Stand by!” literally.

And G!d spoke to Moshe saying: they are right. And here’s the new law, a second chance, a Pesach sheni, and not just for them, they were tamei because of a funeral, but for those who are too far away on a journey. And for the Ger, the stranger who resides in your midst. There shall be one law for the stranger and for the native born.

An amendment to the Torah! Was it imperfect to begin with? 

Rather, perhaps it was a test! G!d was waiting for them to say, “what about justice, what about a chance for me to be a part of the people”, and they passed the test, G!d reached out and included others under the tent. There shall be one law for the stranger and the native born. And right after these words in the text, Shechina rests upon the tent.  Maybe G!d is still waiting for us to take the first steps to unifying the dualities!

Naso: Why the Wild Hair?

 Did you ever feel the need to be like Thoreau living on Walden pond, opting out of the “rat race” for a while?  To ditch the “military industrial complex” (a phrase I learned from my twenty two year old kid) or like Wordsworth to separate from the

“world (that is) too much with us, late and soon,

Getting and spending, we lay waste our powers…”

Not to numb the senses and simply escape, but to find out how to connect to G!d, nature the infinite universe? How would it feel staying apart?  What would be gained and lost? What of the loneliness? And how would others recognize your choice and give you space, and… what would you do about your hair?!

 In this This week’s parashah, Naso, a pathway is given

Bamidbar chapter 6:2: If anyone, man or woman, can make a Nazir’s vow, to set themself apart for G!d,

There are really only three requirements to becoming a Nazirite: 1. No wine or other intoxicants  2. not go near a dead person, not even a close relative 3. To grow your hair wild!

 “Kodesh yihyeh, gadel pera s’ar rosho” For all the term of their vow as nazir, no razor shall pass over their head; it will remain holy for all of their days as a Nazir, Holy to  G!d, the hair of their head being left to grow untrimmed. 

There was a loud party in my neighborhood this past weekend, blasting the silence of the night as I took a walk, with typical dance and DJ songs. Alcohol I’m sure was had, and people celebrated, and I’ve been there. My daughter’s Bat mitzvah was celebrated in the back yard, and I enjoyed sharing food and drink and laughter with family and friends. Sometimes, though,  feeling hollow, hevel, as Ecclesiastes says, I yearn for only the silence, and to step out under the stars. Sometimes I cannot join genuinely in the rejoicing. Requirement #1, if you vow to be a Nazir is not to indulge in alcohol or intoxicants: no celebrations.

The second requirement of the Nazirite is to not attend a funeral, to be unavailable to share in the community’s losses, or even those of your own family. Without the solace of becoming vulnerable in your joy, perhaps the symmetry is not to be vulnerable to the loss of loved ones. It reminds me of  what my yoga teacher, Maria says about the Buddhist masters who respond with equanimity to life’s highs and lows.

So why the long, wild hair?  Rafael Sforno, the renaissance commentator says it means the hair should not be coiffed, not formed into any shape. Perhaps it makes the Nazirite less judgmental of self and others.  I had previously thought that maybe the wisdom was in avoiding the harsh metal razor.  But the holiness of the hair is mentioned too many times:  I recognize now that it’s more of a mountain-man/-woman thing: letting be what will grow. Just as so many haven’t taken haircuts this year!

Rashi explains: “his hair shall be holy, In that he must let it grow freely to let grow the overgrowth, in Hebrew  perah of the hair on his head..  Interestingly the other meaning of the word “Perah” is a leader.

The Zohar pictures the white hair and beard of the Ancient Holy One, Attika Kadisha as rays of shefa and mazal.

And of course there was Shimshon -whose name is related to shemesh , the sun, and who is according to Dr Ely Levine a “a liminal hero, sitting on the edge of what is acceptable and what is not.”  Hair is interestingly a liminal material, between life and death. Formed in the follicle within the dermis by living cells, cells die as they are forced up through the shaft, and all that we see is entirely made of dead cells and materials. Why does a toddler cry during that first haircut? They think it will hurt! But it doesn’t. The other body material made in a similar way are finger and toenails, Klippot. Both are formed from dead cells filled with the tough protein keratin. Fish scales, shark teeth, feathers, fur: all keratin, as is the dead outer protective epidermis of our own skin. Ironically fingernails are considered to have demonic potential, even as the Nazir’s hair is holy. They grow a bit after death, dirt accumulates beneath them, they can be sharp and cutting, and to keep them growing very long will curl them and make using the hands difficult. Traditionally you would cut nails before Shabbat, and either burn them (best choice) or bury them, or they are dangerous according to Tikkunei Zohar! And when we do havdallah, turn nails toward the flame, to ensure that the light holds sway over them during the week.

When your vow is done, a ceremony of cutting the sacred hair, and burning it ends the Nazirite’s separation when he or she rejoins with a drink and celebration. Or perhaps donating to locks of love.

The musical Hair opened on Broadway in 1968. I was ten years old, and I saw a 50 year revival. A time of civil unrest, similar to today, gre w a youth culture of subversive disengagement. Opposition to: the war in Vietnam, racism, to sexism, and to poisoning of the earth, reactions to the assassinations of King and the Kennedy brothers, was expressed by young men by growing their hair “long as I can grow it” In this musical, hair became a symbol of a new culture, The dawning of the age of Aquarius. When violence and war take a friend’s life, they urgently pray to let the sun shine in!

Israeli New Age musician Idan Raichel had beautiful long dreadlocks, which somehow made the cries more plaintiff Mimaamikim karati eilaich- From the depths I call to you! He cut his long dreadlocks recently, and shaved his hair close to the scalp. He explained: he’s a family man now, with two pre-teen daughters.  Perhaps the symbol of his new role in society was to shave his head as the Nazirite does .

All of these are possible answers to the opening question: Why the wild hair? But the most beautiful answer floated to my ears yesterday in the words of poet Elana Klugman spoken in her poem Revelations: The Toratot of  Ruth about Ruth and other tales, and hopes for gentler times, as she imagined G!d as

the infinite

tenderness of All

caressing our wild hair.

That’s why the wild hair.

Bamidbar 2021, Let’s get lost together!

Getting lost alone can be terrifying, but together, what an adventure it can be! Our parashah and new book of Torah is Bamidbar meaning “in the wilderness”; And almost as soon as arrive we get lost, wandering in a wilderness in space and time. A large roaming community – how does that work? How can we create order in the wilderness? How meet everyone’s needs? How protect children in this mobile community? And how can we protect our values: truth, justice and peace? Three things that the whole world rests on, (Pirke avot 1:18)

 To answer I’ve found one take-away each from Chapters 1,2, and 3 of Numbers:

Chapter one: “Lift up the heads  of the children of Israel by family and house and mispar shemot “count the names” Raphael Sforno, Italian Renaissance, commentator explains it means each name has a story: at that time, the names of the each reflected their specific individuality, virtues. 

So first to create order, to lift up the individual, locate them within a family/tribe, Just as in time we are Counting days of the omer – each day precious, each seed of barley reaching toward the sky.

Chapter 2 is organizing tribes by space

Eastward, facing the rising sun is Judah, Zevulun and Issachar,

Westward, facing the setting sun is the tribe of Ephraim, Menasheh and Benyamin

Facing the North wind is Napthali, Dan and Asher

Facing the Southern sun: Gad, Reuben and Simeon

We know where we belong, within our family and in relation to one another, the sun, earth and wind

And in Chapter three: Levites, who guard and serve the Israelites by caring for the innermost mishkan, a beautiful space to hold the laws and let G!d’s presence enter and dwell among our community: heart, truth, and inspiration!

Surrounded and supported by community, against the unpredictability of the world. This geometric arrangement reminds me of the Angel’s blessing we say at bedtime:

B’shem Hashem Elohai Yisrael

M’mini Michael – (on our right Michael, angel who is like G!d)

M’smoli Gavriel – (on our left Gavriel, angel of Strength)

Um’lfanai Uriel – (in front of us Uriel, angel of Light

Um’achorai R’fael – (behind us R’fael, angel of Healing)

Val roshi v’al roshi Schinat El – (Above us G!d’s feminine facet: Shechinah)

Here are three lovely versions: Carlebach; Elana Brody, and Debbie Friedman

It was then I realized the meaning in my own life: community of friends around me, helping me through wilderness are actually Angels, each one unique! Together we’ve been counting the days of the omer, each day focusing on embodying middot: falling in love,  flexing our courage, practicing gratitude, endurance, listening for harmony, feeling connected, and knowing we are surrounded by majesty.  We can all meet at Sinai now, ready to looking anew at our one another with eyes and hearts open.  We’re almost ready for TORAH! (also blintzes and cheesecake!) May peace reign. Chag Shavuot Sameach!

Behar 2021

Behar means upon the mountain, Mount Sinai that is. t includes the commandments of the Shmita, of letting the land rest every seven years, like a huge exhale, and letting our unceasing work upon it rest as well.  The planet has exhales and inhales during the seasons, and the Holy Days reflect very ancient traditions that accompany this. Our counting of the omer for example, was a holding of the breath, praying that there would be dew, and not too much rain each day so that the seeds of the grain could sprout into tall crops and our families would be fed. Imagine holding our breath each day and watching the grain grow and yearning. We take our food so much for granted, and tradition has many ways to acknowledge our gratitude for the miracle of sustenance. For example the b’rachot before and after eating.  The omer bundles with this our higher aspirations and yearning for understanding and measuring our souls. Today is Netzach she’b Yesod – endurance with our connections with one another and with the earth. The shmita and yovel offer solutions to endure upon the land and with one another, and then this command from verses 23 and 24 to remind us and give us a perspective Lev 25:23, 24

But the land must not be sold beyond reclaim, for the land is Mine;

you are but strangers resident with Me.

The verb Tz’mitut is found only here and in verse 30 in the entire Torah. From the verb Tzamat to end or exterminate, We don’t have the landlord’s permission to destroy our home, even if we should want to, for short term profit! Rashi explains : Your eye shall not be evil towards it  for it is not yours.  Ibn Ezra Explains: The word tzemitut is similar¹⁰⁵In meaning. To keritut (divorcement) The ⁷From the root tzadi, mem, tav. (will cut them off) it is a hyperlink to psalm 94: That G!d  will cut them off

Ramban Explains: By way of the Truth,(Kaballa) the meaning of the expression for the Land is Mine is like and they take ‘unto Me’ an offering.¹⁸⁸Exodus 25:2…for the Jubilee will apply in the world – not only in the land of Israel

Throughout the land that you hold, you must provide for the redemption of the land.

In another connection between humans and the land, just as we redeem captives, we must redeem land.

Human ownership of land is an illusion. If we love our children, we will educate ourselves into being stewards of the land: ovdah v’shamra, to serve and to guard Shechinah whose presence is b’chol ha arets.  Because the land is G!d’s, not ours

The land needs to breathe and we need to rest and breathe too on Shabbat, If we ignore these commands, R Arthur Waskow reminds us, that in the Next parashah, Behukotai, we pay the price, the land will simply demand and take her Sabbaths, at our expense.  With the hope that these truths can set us free: keratem Dror b’artzecha: and may we be strong: Chazak Chazak v’nitchazek

Emor 2021

The LORD said to Moses: Speak to the priests, the sons of Aaron, and say

to them: None shall make himself tamei (impure to bring an offering in the

Mishkan) for any nefesh among his people,

Emor, the command to speak, follows vayomer, and G!d spoke, and the v’amarta – you shall tell a three fold repetition of speaking. Rambam explains we must say over and over, and Rashi explains, teach the children, and so the repetition. There is a story of Rav Pinchas of Koretz, whose brother was an eminent scholar, but Pinchas was all fire and emotion, who often was unable to study, because when the paragraph began “And G!d said” he would cry out in wonder, and run outside so moved by that miracle. Here we have G!d speaking, and then the same word AMAR repeated, three times, for Moshe will say and tell them. I can’t even imagine how Pinchas would react. For me, It reflects a beautiful echoing: G!d speaks and Moshe speaks, and then the kohanim must teach. But will our teachings be good enough? G!d’s speach is the pure ideal. Ours will be flawed by the limitations of our understanding and capacities, and perhaps there will be dissonance between them, a paradox.

AND who is this nefesh that will make the Kohen tame? Often used to mean person Nefesh is a level of soul, the life-force of the body, the awareness of the body. enmeshing of the Nefesh with cells and tissues body. Nefesh here is understood to mean a body which has died. I am learning about Jewish concepts of what happens to the soul after death, and merging it with my own understanding from biology, and finding it very enriching. Judaism does not separate mind from body, they are enmeshed. Just as the cells still remain alive, many of them, in the body, so the soul is still partly there

So why would this contact make the Kohen tamei? This is an important question, because there are many kohanim that still will not go to a funeral. My teacher Reb Marcia our teacher, who explained that the Mishkan is no longer here so many Kohanim do not feel that restriction. That’s a good thing because in Ex 19:6 says we should be a nation of kohanim!

This non-separation of life and death, I think, explains why the Kohanim become tamei with contact: this nefesh is a mixture of life and death, a dangerous in between place. The kohen is supposed to radiate an ideal, be symbolic of pure life. Yet he is mortal, human flawed as we all are, and so the paradox. We all exist within this contradiction: harmony and beauty exists and so does dissonance and despair. Mortality collides with our visions of eternity. In perhaps the most challenging verse of Emor, 17 Moshe is to explain to Aharon that any of his chilren

who has a mum/defect shall not draw near and offer nourishment to God.

But we are a nation of Kohanim, and I want to draw near, and bring the offerings of my heartand somehow nourish this world and G!d, AND I, like 26% of Americans, have a mum, a disability. Further I’ve learned that many wounds are invisible, yet disabling. And I pray G!d will accept my prayer, though I am imperfect.

Rabbi Shefa offers this teaching about Emor: Our spiritual challenge is to acknowledge with eyes wide open, our flaws, the harm we cause through them: the suffering, injustice and cruelty that pervade our world…AND at the same time… to see the absolute perfection of it all.

I know R Shefa is right, and the only way through is …through – I am broken, but have known visions of perfections, hear dischord, but know harmony. Am mortal but can conceive of an immortal soul, The paradox is the way home. Maybe that why Torah repeats AMAR 3 times.The first is G!d’s speech, the second is our flawed speech, the third is our speech through the crucible of recognizing of our wounds and defects, the third is our healed speech made holy once again.