Rosh Hashanah 5783
“Cuanudo el Rey Nimrod” Avram avinu, padre querido, padre bendicho, luz de Yisrael” This song tells a fascinating midrash!
When my oldest was a toddler and we transitioned from a crib to a bed, she would sometimes get up in the night and want to climb into our bed. I’d let her bring her sleeping bag in to be near me. Eventually as a parent you want to make them feel safe in their own bed. Stories helped, and lullabies, and the bed time Shema. It helps the monsters in the closet and under the bed and other such fears disappear into fantasy.” The world is a safe place, it’s ok to go to bed, we tell them”
We are giving our child the gift of Bitachon. It means the trust and faith that things will be OK. For much of my life, this trait/middah was my greatest challenge, I yearned for more of it. As I reassured my children, some of it rubbed off on me. But the world really is a scary place, and I worry for their safety. I yearned to have more of the trust that, in the words of the RDMLK Jr “the arc of the universe is long but it bends toward justice” or the belief in a loving G*d. The complete lack of bitachon can lead to anxiety, depression, and hopelessness. Just as this lack is crippling, can there be too much of a good thing, too much Bitachon? I think Abraham/ Avraham avinu had perfect trust, and that because it was perfect, he was flawed.
We will read in the Torah this Rosh Hashanah as we do each year of Avraham andthe binding of Isaac, of a father that almost sacrifices his son. Not just any father, but our founding father, whose name means father of nations who is traditionally identified with the property of chesed, purelove. What does this legend we read each year teach us? One thing I know with perfect bitachon, it does NOT it teach us to sacrifice our beloved children for our faith. Perhaps the essence of Judaism is , “it’s for the kinder, for the sake of the children. R Yitrz Greenberg famously writes that this is the whole point, that in amidst ancient cultures who sacrificed their children to the gods, we would not.
So who is this Avrahav Avinu? We knowfrom Genesis that he was the son of a prominent man named Terah, Did you remember that Terah was an idol maker and that the child Avram smashed his father’s idols? It’s not in Torah, you won’t find it anywhere. It’s in legends called midrash
Midrash is a collection of our legends that fill in the missing details of Torah. The midrash continues, flashback to a star in the sky that foretells the birth of a our holy renegade by advisors to the mythical king Nimrod. They tell him a boy is about to be born who would challenge his power. Nimrod then ordered the midwives to kill all the boy babies. His mother, Terah’s wife hid her pregnancy and when her time to deliver came, gave birth in a hidden cave. After a day the child spoke to her and told her to return home, that he was going to be taken care of Divinely as a servant of the Holy One! So she abandoned the child and went home. When She returned 3 weeks later, the child had grown up and had figured out there is only One G*d, that all is One. He was brought to the palace of Nimrod, where this pipsqueak of a boy indeed challenges the king’s worship of fire. You must admit, that takes confidence- bitachon. The boy argues “But the rain puts out fire, shouldn’t we worship the rain? OK, sure, said Nimrod. But the clouds make the rain, should we not worship the clouds? OK, sure said Nimrod. But the winds disperse the clouds, should we not worship the winds? OK sure, said Nimrod. But a person can resist the wind…ENOUGH, see if, your G*d will protect you now, said the Despot, and throws Avram into the furnace, and Avram survives, emerges unscathed!
Next we hear of Avram , he married a beautiful princess named Sarai he leaves the land of his birth, and his father’s house to a land that G*d would show them. Again
bitahon! Inspired to follow G*d without knowing the destination, trusting things will be OK. But Avram does NOT have perfect bitachon yet: he was not always able to keep fear away: tell them you are my sister, he said to Sarah, I’m afraid they will kill me, you are so beautiful. (I know, a terrible thing to do to Sarai, but perhaps she was the stronger of the two!) It turns out G*d was with them, and Abraham’s love and faith would grow. At Sodom, he was strong enough to put his life on the line by arguing truth to power: will not the judge of all the earth do justice? Abe challenged. And the answer: for the sake of ten righteous I will spare the city! His understanding and trust that G*d is loving, strengthens even more.
Still, he years for children, and G*d has promised him descendants as many as the sands on the shore and the stars in the sky. Isaac, whose name means laughter, was a loved, and yearned-for child.
I Imagine, Abraham and Sarah felt overwhelming love when Isaac was born -a child in their old age- past any expectations. The love must have been pure unconditional, love without boundaries
Then Abraham is “put to the test” we are told. Take your son, whom you love, Isaac, and offer him up as a burnt offering. Perhaps Avraham had perfect faith in a loving G*d that would save Isaac as he himself had been saved. And that’s the flaw. He didn’t argue, though he’d argued with Nimrod and G*d. He didn’t consult with anyone but G*d, not his wife, not Isaac, only the Donkey knew where they were going. What did he say during those three days? He tied his son on the altar, and reaches out the knife. He almost does the deed, at the very last minute his ears were opened. Avraham, Avraham! Midrash says the knife melted from the angel’s tears, not the father’s tears. Then Avraham lifts up his eyes. But was all disaster averted, Isaac lives, but separates from his father. They do not meet again until Avraham is buried. A relationship is severed. Sarah dies also, 2 relationships severed.
Avraham’s perfect trust is too great. That kind of certainty can cause Crusades, and suicide bombers.
We are not named the children of Avraham, but the children of Yisrael, A name given to Jacob when he wrestled with a “divine or human” being all night long and prevailed. A name meaning G*d-wrestler. That wrestling, and longing is a healthy, necessary thing. “when we are absolutely certain we’ve arrived we are lost”
Too much certainty that things will be just fine, leads to complacency and inaction. We lose that fear which is “reshit chochma” the beginning of wisdom. “We’ve been through troubles before, everything will be fine” we say, and go about our business.
I no longer struggle with bitachon. Now I focus on savlanut, patience 😊 It feels like a miracle to me to not have this demon on my back. To what do I credit my success. One part is my return and embrace of our heritage and connection to a loving G*d and loving community. But I am well aware the needs tikkun, repair
Activist Rabbi Jaffe writes in his book (lent to me by a friend) Changing the world from the inside out, that each of us is somewhere on a continuum of bitachon.
Activists inspire me – they help me hit the sweet spot, of bitachon.
One such person is Greta Thunberg. Born in 2002, in Sweden, she became despondent upon learning of climate change. In her despondency she stopped attending school, this depression went on for a year. She had very little bitachon. Until she found a pathway to hope: becoming a child activist. “no one is too small to make a difference” she said, and this quote is on the bottom of my syllabi at school. She sat with a sign, alone, in the snow outside the Swedish Parliament. Until more students joined, and there was an army of kids. Then covid hit. Greta advocated for equitable vaccine distribution, and her foundation donated a ton of money to that cause. Greta chides us – we need to act as though our house is on fire, she says, because it is. My own children, in their activism inspire me.
As do my friends who support me, Last summer, with Chaya’s help, New Jersey had a Jewish Climate activist voice through Dayenu, the call for climate justice. Two high school children activist, Sarah and Shawn were there, four Rabbis blew Shofar. We can all do something. Try it, along with the Shema, it may help you sleep better, help you find a sweet spot of Bitacchon
If we continue to be complacent, it is they we will suffer. We are on the mountain top, our children are in danger. Will our ears be open when the angel’s cry and call our name? Will we lift our eyes to the alternative? There is still time.
May are hearts open to the cry of the shofar, it’s calling our name.
Miryam's Space 