As we draw near the end of the book of Numbers, and as we count down to the ninth of Av, a reminder that numbers can be important! If you are  Yankees fan, you know that #42 belongs to the great Jackie Robinson. If you have read the wonderful, strange, funny book, Hitchhiker’s Guide to Galaxy –, the answer to everything in life was calculated to be 42. Of course, it’s silly, you cannot calculate the answer to the meaning of life, but still, numbers and counting your days is important! In parashat Masei there are 42 stops and journeys the Israelites take on their way from Miztrayim, the place of slavery to the promised land.  That’s quite a lot: We are also counting down the days to Tisha B’av, a day of mourning for all the destruction in our history, a descent to honor sadness, In order to Be able to ascend. Most of the wandering (38) years is a result of the Israelites lack of faith, that G!d would be with them. The wilderness becomes a crucible to forge a free, rather than slave mentality.  Source page for these writings

Think about the various places you have been in your life’s journey. Maybe you are like me: when I tell my story, most of the time I don’t include the journeys have been too painful or embarrassing, those that I’ve either repressed or just edited out. Why tell those stories at all?

I have found out, and I bet you know: it’s to heal, as Rabbi David Ingber has shown so inspiringly with Shabbat of the Child.  But like the Israelites, how do we know if/ that G!d is with us each stop along the way – what about during hard the hard times?

Midrash Tanchuma explains that the Holy One was with us the entire time, in the Parable of a King who journeys with his child to a series of health spas, and the recalls the journey to search for healing fondly . AND

Evidence that G!d was with us all along is in the number 42,

For there is a 42 letter name of G!d reflected in the prayer Ana B’Koach, “untangle our knots”, a 42 word prayer, each word corresponding to one of the stops in the journey!

The commentary Or HaChayim goes on to ask: why focus on the moving, rather than the destinations?  I studied with R’ Mimi Feigelson thhttps://jwa.org/rabbis/narrators/feigelson-mimiis past week, who spoke of how much she has changed, and the importance of being open to change. To look in the mirror at the end of the day, and not know “who you are” that Ayin, openness. The change itself is a yearning, to follow holiness, “Dancing in G!d’s earthquake” as R Arthur Waskow says.

So keep change in your pockets at all times, for the bus, for the beggar…

Keep on marching ahead to that place where you learn what simplicity
is; What commitment is for
Why the eyes were created
Why the soul is transparent
Why there’s no greater gift
In this wondrous world
Than to suffer a heart filled with love for no reason ….

Keep change in your pockets at all times! ~ Danny Maseng

Machla Noa, Hogla, Milkah and Tirtzah

I love these names, they are five of my biblical heroines.  Welcome to Parashat Pinchas!

Numbers, chapters 26-7 is genealogy almost entirely in the male.  Interestingly also repeated are those who have died, and who don’t leave descendants. Link to Source Page

Korach’s death is mentioned but his sons live; Nadav and Avihu’s deaths are mentioned again- though they didn’t leave descendants, their names live on. Tzelophechad, like Tevya had 5 daughters, and they had no property rights at all, because no women did, and their names had no way to persist into the future

How is that so  important, that a name lives on? Well in one practical way, each name by tribe is also how promised land will pass through the generations. Remember, they haven’t gotten there yet, but unlike many of the cranky Israelites, they believe in the promise – that we’re going home. Beyond the practical, to tell our stories can be life itself.  Our stories make meaning of who we are and share that essence, weaving the fragments of our life into a single container. With our story  according to Marc Margolius, we “fix the brokenness of our reality” into a whole. To tell your story, your pain and your joys is profound, a way to find common ground, connect to values, ideals and to know your life matters. The oppressed, the powerless are voiceless, and as a shy person as a child, I came only slowly to find my voice

Vatikrovna ,they drew near, and Va-amodna  they stood before Moses, Eleazar the priest, the princes, and the whole assembly, at the  opening of the Tent of Meeting, and they said, Our father died in the wilderness. He was not one of the gang of Korah’s witnesses, who banded together against G!d, but died for his own sin; and sons – he had none. (4) Why should the name of our father be lost from the midst of his family just because he had no son? Give us a holding among our father’s brothers.”.

How do these five sisters, in a society where women are disenfranchised find the courage to challenge Moses, the Torah, the status quo?  Ohr haChayim explains,  they joined together with one another, and consulted with their clan, that they both came near, and stood up means they shed their veil of timidity and stood with  sufficient self-assurance to face Moses directly. And they won an amendment to the Torah! (5) Moses brought their law before the G!d. (6) And the G!d said to Moses, (7) “Yes, The words of Zelophehad’s daughters are true: you must surely give to them a hereditary holding among their father’s brothers; transfer their father’s share to them. (8) “And speak to the Israelite people saying: ‘If a man dies without a son, you shall transfer his property to his daughter Rashi explains -God really said: Exactly so is this chapter written before me on High (Sifrei Bamidbar 134:1). This tells us that their eye saw what Moses’ eye did not see. (They had a finer perception of what was just in the law of inheritance than Moses had.) So they are heroes because they wrote themselves into the story,

Who lives, who dies, who tells your story…   ~LM Miranda

And when you’re gone, who remembers your name?
Who keeps your flame? 
Who tells your story?  (Machlah, Noa, Hogla, Mika and Tirtza)

We put ourselves back in the narrative  
We stop wasting time on tears
(Machlah, Noa, Hogla, Mika and Tirtza) (They tell our story)         

In their eyes I see us, the disenfranchised of today.

Mah tovu – What goodness! I love this Parashah, Balak.

-for the Mah Tovu, the prayer of early morning that proclaims what goodness is in our tents

for its ecumenism, because the words of Mah tovu are spoken by a non Jewish-prophet who blesses the Israelites rather than cursing them, who is open to the voice of G!d

for its slapstick comedy, even before Shrek, of the wizard who cannot see as much as his hinny (female donkey).

Something new in this years journey found in the verses I’m focusing on this Shabbat are clues to our own lives, and hints of Bilam’s darkness.  Source sheet linked here

Sometimes in Torah, G!d speaks to people, and not just Jewish people. When G!d asks a question of an human I pay close attention, for I’ve learned they are asked of each one of us!  Where are you?! Asks G!d of Adam.   Where is your brother, asks G!d of Kayin?

In this week’s parashah, Balaak ben Tzippor, the fearful King, (his name means “destruction, son of Bird”) sends  messengers versed in the art of Divining(!) The future, to seek out Bilam, the infamous wizard of these times.

They knock on Bilam’s door, these important people.

Imagine, you are a wizard, maybe Gandalf, Dumbledoor, or Bilam,  alone in your cabin in the mountains, and you hear a knock on the door, you open it, and it’s Kamala Harris, and entourage. They’re fearful, and ask you to use your powers to bring down destruction on an entire people.  What do you do? Of course, you let them in, stay the night. I think I’d want a selfie. I’m not really going to harm anyone, but, you know, Kamala slept here!…

You explain to them patiently: “these people have G!d protecting them, and at night, ba-layla, I will seek permission.”

Why do they need a wizard if they are Diviners? Because these new people are literally muddying the spiritual waters, hiding the “ayin” the eyes of the earth from view!
The wells of water were thought to be as eyes reflecting the heavens!

And indeed, a miracle which the trope begins very matter-of-factly, G!d comes to Bilam (perhaps they have conversed before!) and G!d asks a question: not who are you Bilam, but who are these people with you?

Balaam said to God, “Balak son of Zippor, king of Moab, sent me them to me, and he goes on to actually exaggerate what they have asked of him:  To G!d. To distort the truth. OY!

Did Bilam listen to G!d really, and answer the question?

No Bilam, who are you hanging with, traveling with, who have you let into your door, into your life? Are you being swayed by their title, the trappings? Do you really know who they are? It’s a question every parent asks their teen.

 I imagine G!d asking this of me! What a difference it makes! I choose to travel with you guys each morning, among others…

And I know this because of the Mah Tovu prayer What goodness there is. I say the words before I open my eyes each morning: I need to know there is goodness before open my eyes, and to remember who I am inside: my values, memories, and dreams as I say good morning to the world. Verses from psalms here are, from context, prayers to keep us from falling into bad company. A solid way to begin each morning, establishing who we really are, committing to goodness, to our values, before we let people in and decide to walk a pathway with them.    

But God said to Balaam, “Do not walk with them. You must not curse (using ta-ohr, the original, not the exaggerated) verb that Bilam uses for cursing that people, for they are blessed.”

Choose wisely who to walk with. And together: Ani v’ata n’shaneh et ha-olam, You and I can change the world. What goodness!

We come from the water, living in the water go back to the water turn the world around. So is life!~Harry Belefonte        

  Source page to the Biblical and other texts referenced.

In this week’s parashah, Miriam, the sister of Aaron and Moses dies, and is buried. What is her brother’s reactions? The community’s? The Torah is completely silent, there is no response! Miriam’s name is part of my own Hebrew name, and literally has the word for water in it, Mayim in Hebrew. This is no coincidence.  Think of Miriam in the Torah, and you will think of water: Miriam watching as her baby brother was drawn from the Nile, Miriam singing and playing music, leading in dance and joy as the Israelites crossed the Sea of Reeds.

Suddenly as we enter chapter 20 of Bamidbar, in the wilderness, the Israelites arrive in the Wilderness of Tzin, meaning flat, and in the very next verse we hear: there is no water!

Rashi explains that since this statement follows immediately after the mention of Miriam’s death, we may learn from it that during the entire forty years they had a magical “well” through Miriam’s merit   Pirke Avot lists this Miraculous well as one of the Ten things created before sundown on that first Shabbat eve!

Water is life! The most abundant and foundational component of living things The universal solvent, so weird and wonderful, that it clings to all -it making life possible. Water soaks the roots allowing crops to grow, and we humans cannot survive without drinking it for more than a couple of days. And yes, Climate change is increasing drought around the world, which causes famine and strife.  Strife will rear its head as a result of drought in parashat Chukat as well.

We live on “the water planet” an image achieved by photographs taken by astronauts that saw our home planet as that gorgeous blue terrarium in space. This image was also was anticipated by the ancient Book, Sefer Yetzirah, where the letter Mem represents water, and was created by the Wind, which was created by the Breath of the Holy One.

From Sefer Yetzirah: Translation~R’ Jill Hammer Waters from Ruach Wind. G!D also engraved and carved in Them: chaos and void, mud and clay; engraved Them as a kind of garden; carved them as a kind of wall, wove them as a kind of ceiling

Notice the earth begins as mud and clay from waters How Does G!d carve waters? With words! And as a weaver. And then by sealing off this precious bubble of life, from the dangerous void beyond with the letters of G!d’s name Yud, Hey and Vav according to Sefer Yetzirah.

The word Yetzirah itself means creation by weaving, and in Kabbalistic philosophy is one of the Four Worlds, or levels of existence. These levels are all present, but our perceptions may be limited to one or another more strongly during our varied experiences. Yetzirah is the level associated with water, and with emotions, particularly of love.  Love, the emotion most intimately creative of life is expressed most powerfully in Shir HaShirim, Song of songs.  Love is the gift that Miriam always brought: connecting Yocheved with her baby, bringing song and joy to the newly liberated.  Love is as fierce as death (Song 8:6), and certainly Miriam’s death represented the loss of this love. Mayim Rabim, many waters cannot quench this love of ours! Is another echo to the song of songs 8:7, mayim rabim, many (or great) waters flows from the rock. The other echo to creation is  chotam, the seal placed on the heart echoes the sealing off of the water planet in Sefer Yetzirah.

Following Miriam’s death, the tragedies of Aaron and Moses’ lives will unfold because there is no water of another kind.  Did you notice? Brothers Moshe and Aharon do not mourn, they shed no tears.

Immediately, the community gangs up on the dry-eyed brothers.  They reach to G!d for outside help.  But within them tears are needed for wholeness.  I spent most of my life with tears locked within. Oh I’d cry at sad movies… but needed much inner opening work to cry at loss. HOW COULD THEY NOT MOURN THEIR SISTER!  Moses and Aaron receive their answer of how to help with the Israelite’s thirst as G!d instructs them in the ways of creation: “Speak, as I spoke, to the rock!” They struck instead. They called the people Marim – you bitter Rabble!  The Rock yielded its water. It had water in it because it was made from water according to Sefer Yetzirah!  The people, Rashi says are not just Marim, rabble, but teachers, Morim  to Moshe and Aaron: it turns out Miriam’s well was always a rock, and they knew it! Now it was indistinguishable from the other rocks. Morim, has the same letters as, you guessed it: Miriam!

In beautiful song, written in 1923 “HaKotel” that speaks longingly of the western wall, the lyric cries: there are men with hearts of stone! (Joel Engel). It is the rock of Moses’ and Aaron’s hearts that must be opened, and the waters of tears that must flow.  Perhaps the blue planet, the terrarium suspended in the void, exists within the water of G!d’s teardrop, or the water that gushes from the Holy One’s broken heart the mess we humans have a tendency to make in this world.

Torah is also likened to water (Bereshit Rabba 66:1) and by extension to love. If we could reach out to one another, and to the earth in love, if we can find the tears for the suffering of children both ours, and those of the stranger, find tears for the destruction of life and beauty in the world, then maybe we can get our act together to preserve the precious variety of life on this blue planet.We come from the water, living in the Torah, Go back to the water, turn the world around. Oh so is life, Ah so is life!

Have you ever been in an earthquake, where the ground beneath your feet which should be solid, begins to roll instead as if it were fluid? The thing that should support you, that should nourish you, terrifies you instead?  Or perhaps it was a metaphoric earthquake in your life?

Korach, the rebel experiences such an earthquake, the earth swallows him at Moses summoning of The Holy One(!) Source sheet linked here for texts

Challenging the authority of Moses and Aaron, Korach is certainly vilified in our tradition, even though he makes a good point: all the community/witnesses are all holy, and the G!d is in their midst.  He says it with 250 leaders at his back: it is clearly an insurrection! The judgement of Korach is righteous, but brutally cruel. The earth opened her mouth and swallowed him and his compatriots up with their households and all their possessions. They went down alive into Sheol, terrifyingly vanishing from the midst of the kahal/congregation. The women, his children, even the babies perish, and a fire follows, as often happens in earthquakes, taking even more lives.

There also is support in our tradition that honors the rebel, and heals the wound of the innocents swallowed alive that day.

For example, after Korach challenges Moses and Aaron, Moses falls on his face as “if in a prophesy” says Ibn Ezra. The implied prophecy: perhaps one day all the community will be holy! The singular is used, as only Moses falls on his face. Aaron does not participate in this drama due to modesty, to keep the peace, and to honor Korach, says the Ramban. In the next chapter Aaron’s staff sprouts flowers and fruits, in the more peaceful battle of the tribes! Now that’s what the earth is supposed to do, sprout almonds!

As for healing the wounds of Korach’s children, they were given the honor of singing fifteen of the most beautiful psalms. According to Midrash Tanchuma, they never died, and sing praises in harmony to this day! After Yonah is swallowed by the great fish, it swims down to the ocean’s depths, “And Jonah saw the Stone of the Foundation there, set in the depths. And he saw the sons of Korach, standing and praying upon it. It said to Yonah, “Behold, you are standing under the Palace of the G!d; pray and you will be answered.” 

Of the psalms of the children of Korach, psalm 85 seems particularly healing in the aftermath of that earthquake. What if the truths of their father’s words, both the prophetic voice and the challenging ones were to meet up with loving kindness? What if the justice given their father could have lovingly kissed peace? Imagine what a world that would be!

Chesed V’Emet, A three part round.

From psalm 85, a psalm of Korach’s Children

Original setting, recording coming soon!

Chesed v’emet nifgashu,

Loving kindness and Truth

have met one another

Imagine that!

Truth shall spring from the earth

Righteousness will gaze down from the sky

And G!d will supply the Good

And the earth will nourish body and soul

And the earth will nourish us whole

Tsedek v’shalom nashaku

Righteousness and Peace

have kissed one another!

This Torah in the memory of HaRav Henry Tzvi Weiner, z’l’ from who started me on my adult Jewish path, and from whom I learned some of this Torah a long time ago, and the Hebrew word for grasshopper: chagivim.

Sh’lach L’chah means “send out for yourselves”, and the Israelite leaders were sent to spy the land. The other emissaries that they sent were words from their mouths. And these words carried a message about the land, that it was scary. These words of fear resulted in an entire generation wandering in the wilderness, unable to enter a land Divinely promised – appropriate- karma for sure.

But what was so bad about their words? Certainly some of the things the spies said were not so bad: Isn’t it just humility when they say “we’re not good enough” And fear is only natural, only human, as is the desire to protect self and family. That land is so harsh it devours its settlers, and the people who live there are Giants, and we looked like grasshoppers to ourselves, and so we were in their eyes.” You can follow in this source sheet in Sefaria.

Besides the fear, do you hear the lie in the words? They could not know how they looked in someone else’s eyes!

What these folks did witness with their own eyes: redemption at the sea and revelation at Sinai. What a gift! Think back on a moment in your own life of a great spiritual encounter: perhaps the birth of a child, or standing on the rim of the grand canyon.  What do you do with that inspiration?  You want to hold it, to let it guide your life. In Sh’lach instead, words inspire fear, and fear leads to violence.  Soon the whole community threatened to pelt Joshua and  Caleb with stones (Numbers 14:10)

In Rabbi Jill Hammer’s class and book on sefer Yetzirah, we’ve learned that G!d used elemental letters to create the parts of the natural world, and Aleph is a mother letter forming Air, and G!d carves (chakak) creation from the air.  I asked “how can one carve air?” Rav Jill replied that with the process of speech both we and G!d carve the air. A stunning answer: speech creates worlds! And not just what you say, but in how you say it: are the words said with love?  As a teacher, I carry with me the great Maya Angelou quote: ‘I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, … but people will never forget how you made them feel.’

We live in challenging times, the truth is for sale – Lies are peddled today for profit or power. And fear and is the emotion that sells. And fear becomes hate.

Conspiracy theories abound about vaccines, and stolen elections. Troubling times.

Perhaps worst of all are the lies we tell about ourselves, like those of the Israelites. They become stumbling blocks: “I’m not good enough, I am worthless” Perhaps they internalize harsh words others told you. According to Sforno, the Israelites thought G!d hated them for their sins, and so were bringing them to die. Perhaps these former slaves have internalized the hateful words of their brutal slave masters.

So how can we counter these feelings? How remember we are children of the Divine, and how hold on to the moments of clarity and inspiration?

Immediately following the Israelite threat to stone Joshua and Caleb Torah tells: then the Presence of the LORD appeared in the Tent of Meeting to all the Israelites. A covenant of G!d’s forgiveness, and a technique to help us remember our inspiration, instead of fear: the Tzitzit. Firstly, says Rashi, it helps us to see. And perhaps see ourselves more clearly: Rashi likens the tzitzit to the curls of our hair! Nachmanides explains that they help us remember, help us to resist skepticism and idolatry. How? It’s the blue; which reminds us of creation of land, sea and sky. Creation/the natural world is our anchor to sanity! The Ramban explains:and the profit of ‘eretz’ (earth) is ‘bakol’ (in all): “And what is the eretz? It is that from which the heavens were hewn, and it is the Throne of the Holy One, blessed be He, and it is ‘the precious stone,’ and ‘the sea of wisdom,’ and corresponding to it is the blue thread in a garment of Fringes.  The land will tell its own truth, even the grasshoppers will participate in songs of praise.  Rabbi Arthur Waskow explains the fringes as reminders of many web-like  connections: to one another, to the natural world and to the Divine.  Look at the fringes, and feel the connections! Then live guided by creation’s inspirations, rather than fears.

Adon olam asher malach; Shechinah ashar Malka;  Hu echad v’ain sheini (Master of the Universe who reigned, Feminine G!dly presence who reigned, is one and not two!)

From Sefer Yetzirah Ten inscriptions:

For the Creator is one

And has no second

And before one,

What are you counting? (translation Rabbi Jill Hammer)

G!d is one, yet also containing feminine and masculine sephirot , or facets, within! G!d is One, not Two, yet there is much duality in the world.  Until now, the song is all I knew of Age of Aquarius! According to Rabbi Lee Moore, who teaches Jewish Trending into the Age of Aquarius, for two millennia we have been in the age of Pisces, which is a very dualistic time, symbolized by two fish swimming in opposite directions. That this is changing, we are entering a new age, G!d willing a kinder and gentler age. Rabbi Moore teaches that we have a role to play with how this will pan out. What can we do to unify conflict and duality?

The parashah this week, B’haalotcha. Has SO MANY dualities, or twos in it, opposing forces. But if you look there is a pathway to one-ness to redemption to be found each time within the text.  

In Chapter Ten, Numbers, there are to be two silver trumpets made. Why two? One trumpet to summon the leaders, Two are played to summon the kahal, the ordinary folks.  And two ways to play the trumpets – the Short blasts for war, which represent brokenness according to Penine Halakhah, Rabbi Eliezer Melamed, The solution: a Tekiyah, a single long blast for peace, for Shabbat.  See Source Sheet linked here

G!d dwells among the people in the wilderness in two forms the cloud covering the Mishkan/Tabernacle, appearing as fire by night. And as long as the cloud could be seen, we’d rest, if not perceived, we broke camp! When we’d break camp (interesting we use “break”!) Moshe would call out Kumah– arise G!d and scatter our enemies.

The resolution? When Moshe would call : Shuv return. And S’forno explained that Shechinah would once again rest with Yisrael

Two prophets ran out (Numbers 11:27) and told Moses, saying, “Eldad and Medad are acting the prophet in the camp!”  Joshua says “restrain them.” The resolution? Moses answers: Would that all the LORD’s people were prophets, that the LORD put His spirit upon them!”

Moses will take a second wife, and both his siblings will criticize him for it, although only Miriam will pay a price.  El Nah Refah nah is the answer, Moshe’s prayer, “Oh G!d, please heal her!”

My favorite though is the law for a Second Pesach, Pesach Sheni (Numbers, chapter 9) You see this law was not originally in the Torah given to Moshe at Sinai.  A group of people who could not offer the Pesach offering approached Moshe and Aharon at the tent of meeting.  It’s not fair, they complained, we want to draw close to G!d too! (Now, you guessed it, there is actually a second time of complaining – “we don’t want manna, we want meat”! with a different motive, that tale has a very different ending.)

This is an appeal to justice and to the desire to approach G!d, and so Moshe says “Stand by!” literally.

And G!d spoke to Moshe saying: they are right. And here’s the new law, a second chance, a Pesach sheni, and not just for them, they were tamei because of a funeral, but for those who are too far away on a journey. And for the Ger, the stranger who resides in your midst. There shall be one law for the stranger and for the native born.

An amendment to the Torah! Was it imperfect to begin with? 

Rather, perhaps it was a test! G!d was waiting for them to say, “what about justice, what about a chance for me to be a part of the people”, and they passed the test, G!d reached out and included others under the tent. There shall be one law for the stranger and the native born. And right after these words in the text, Shechina rests upon the tent.  Maybe G!d is still waiting for us to take the first steps to unifying the dualities!

 Did you ever feel the need to be like Thoreau living on Walden pond, opting out of the “rat race” for a while?  To ditch the “military industrial complex” (a phrase I learned from my twenty two year old kid) or like Wordsworth to separate from the

“world (that is) too much with us, late and soon,

Getting and spending, we lay waste our powers…”

Not to numb the senses and simply escape, but to find out how to connect to G8d, nature the infinite universe? How would it feel staying apart?  What would be gained and lost? What of the loneliness? And how would others recognize your choice and give you space, and… what would you do about your hair?!

 In this This week’s parashah, Naso, a pathway is given

Bamidbar chapter 6:2: If anyone, man or woman, can make a Nazir’s vow, to set themself apart for G8d,

There are really only three requirements to becoming a Nazir (Nazirite in English): 1. No wine or other intoxicants  2. not go near a dead person, not even a close relative 3. To grow your hair wild!

 “Kodesh yihyeh, gadel pera s’ar rosho” For all the term of their vow as nazir, no razor shall pass over their head; it will remain holy for all of their days as a Nazir, Holy to  G8d, the hair of their head being left to grow untrimmed. 

There was a loud party in my neighborhood this past weekend, blasting the silence of the night as I took a walk, with typical dance and DJ songs. Alcohol I’m sure was had, and people celebrated, and I’ve been there. My daughter’s Bat mitzvah was celebrated in the back yard, and I enjoyed sharing food and drink and laughter with family and friends. Sometimes, though, I yearn for only the silence, and to step out under the stars. Sometimes I cannot join genuinely in the rejoicing. Requirement #1, if you vow to be a Nazir is not to indulge in alcohol or intoxicants: no celebrations.

The second requirement of the Nazirite is to not attend a funeral, to be unavailable to share in the community’s losses, or even those of your own family. Without the solace of becoming vulnerable in joy, perhaps the symmetry is not to be vulnerable to the loss of loved ones. It reminds me of  what my yoga teacher, Maria says about the Buddhist masters who respond with equanimity to life’s highs and lows.

So why the long, wild hair?  Rafael Sforno, the renaissance commentator says it means the hair should not be coiffed, not formed into any shape. Perhaps it makes the Nazirite less judgmental of self and others.  I had previously thought that maybe the wisdom was in avoiding the harsh metal razor.  But the holiness of the hair is mentioned too many times:  I recognize now that it’s more of a mountain-man/-woman thing: letting be what will grow. Just as so many haven’t taken haircuts this year!

Rashi explains: “his hair shall be holy, In that he must let it grow freely to let grow the overgrowth, in Hebrew  perah of the hair on his head..  Interestingly the other meaning of the word “Perah” is a leader.

The Zohar pictures the white hair and beard of the Ancient Holy One, Attika Kadisha as rays of shefa (flow of abundance).

And of course there was Shimshon (Samson) -whose name is related to shemesh , the sun, and who is according to Dr Ely Levine a “a liminal hero, sitting on the edge of what is acceptable and what is not.”  Hair is interestingly a liminal material, between life and death. Formed in the follicle within the dermis by living cells, cells die as they are forced up through the shaft, and all that we see is entirely made of dead cells and materials. Why does a toddler cry during that first haircut? They think it will hurt! But it doesn’t. The other body material made in a similar way are finger and toenails, Klippot. Both are formed from dead cells filled with the tough protein keratin. Fish scales, shark teeth, feathers, fur: all keratin, as is the dead outer protective epidermis of our own skin. Ironically fingernails are considered to have demonic potential, even as the Nazir’s hair is holy. They grow a bit after death, dirt accumulates beneath them, they can be sharp and cutting, and to keep them growing very long will curl them and make using the hands difficult. Traditionally you would cut nails before Shabbat, and either burn them (best choice) or bury them, or they are dangerous according to Tikkunei Zohar! And when we do havdallah, turn nails toward the flame, to ensure that the light holds sway over them during the week.

When your vow is done, a ceremony of cutting the sacred hair, and burning it ends the Nazirite’s separation when he or she rejoins with a drink and celebration. Or perhaps donating to locks of love.

The musical Hair opened on Broadway in 1968. I was ten years old, and I saw a 50 year revival. A time of civil unrest, similar to today, grew a youth culture of subversive disengagement. Opposition to: the war in Vietnam, racism, to sexism, and to poisoning of the earth, reactions to the assassinations of King and the Kennedy brothers, was expressed by young men by growing their hair “long as God can grow it” In this musical, hair became a symbol of a new culture, The dawning of the age of Aquarius. Lyrics to the song Hair

Israeli New Age musician Idan Raichel had beautiful long dreadlocks, which somehow made the cries more plaintiff Mimaamikim karati eilaich- From the depths I call to you! He cut his long dreadlocks recently, and shaved his hair close to the scalp. He explained: he’s a family man now, with two pre-teen daughters.  Perhaps the symbol of his new role in society was to shave his head as the Nazirite does .

All of these are possible answers to the opening question: Why the wild hair?

Getting lost alone can be terrifying, but together, what an adventure it can be! Our parashah and new book of Torah is Bamidbar meaning “in the wilderness”; And almost as soon as arrive we get lost, wandering in a wilderness in space and time. A large roaming community – how does that work? How can we create order in the wilderness? How meet everyone’s needs? How protect children in this mobile community? And how can we protect our values: truth, justice and peace? Three things that the whole world rests on, (Pirke avot 1:18)

 To answer I’ve found one take-away each from Chapters 1,2, and 3 of Numbers:

Chapter one: “Lift up the heads  of the children of Israel by family and house and mispar shemot “count the names” Raphael Sforno, Italian Renaissance, commentator explains it means each name has a story: at that time, the names of the each reflected their specific individuality, virtues. 

So first to create order, to lift up the individual, locate them within a family/tribe, Just as in time we are Counting days of the omer – each day precious, each seed of barley reaching toward the sky.

Chapter 2 is organizing tribes by space

Eastward, facing the rising sun is Judah, Zevulun and Issachar,

Westward, facing the setting sun is the tribe of Ephraim, Menasheh and Benyamin

Facing the North wind is Napthali, Dan and Asher

Facing the Southern sun: Gad, Reuben and Simeon

We know where we belong, within our family and in relation to one another, the sun, earth and wind

And in Chapter three: Levites, who guard and serve the Israelites by caring for the innermost mishkan, a beautiful space to hold the laws and let G!d’s presence enter and dwell among our community: heart, truth, and inspiration!

Surrounded and supported by community, against the unpredictability of the world. This geometric arrangement reminds me of the Angel’s blessing we say at bedtime:

B’shem Hashem Elohai Yisrael

M’mini Michael – (on our right Michael, angel who is like G!d)

M’smoli Gavriel – (on our left Gavriel, angel of Strength)

Um’lfanai Uriel – (in front of us Uriel, angel of Light

Um’achorai R’fael – (behind us R’fael, angel of Healing)

Val roshi v’al roshi Schinat El – (Above us G!d’s feminine facet: Shechinah)

Here are three lovely versions: Carlebach; Elana Brody, and Debbie Friedman

It was then I realized the meaning in my own life: community of friends around me, helping me through wilderness are actually Angels, each one unique! Together we’ve been counting the days of the omer, each day focusing on embodying middot: falling in love,  flexing our courage, practicing gratitude, endurance, listening for harmony, feeling connected, and knowing we are surrounded by majesty.  We can all meet at Sinai now, ready to looking anew at our one another with eyes and hearts open.  We’re almost ready for TORAH! (also blintzes and cheesecake!) May peace reign. Chag Shavuot Sameach!

Behar means upon the mountain, Mount Sinai that is. t includes the commandments of the Shmita, of letting the land rest every seven years, like a huge exhale, and letting our unceasing work upon it rest as well.  The planet has exhales and inhales during the seasons, and the Holy Days reflect very ancient traditions that accompany this. Our counting of the omer for example, was a holding of the breath, praying that there would be dew, and not too much rain each day so that the seeds of the grain could sprout into tall crops and our families would be fed. Imagine holding our breath each day and watching the grain grow and yearning. We take our food so much for granted, and tradition has many ways to acknowledge our gratitude for the miracle of sustenance. For example the b’rachot before and after eating.  The omer bundles with this our higher aspirations and yearning for understanding and measuring our souls. Today is Netzach she’b Yesod – endurance with our connections with one another and with the earth. The shmita and yovel offer solutions to endure upon the land and with one another, and then this command from verses 23 and 24 to remind us and give us a perspective Lev 25:23, 24

But the land must not be sold beyond reclaim, for the land is Mine;

you are but strangers resident with Me.

The verb Tz’mitut is found only here and in verse 30 in the entire Torah. From the verb Tzamat to end or exterminate, We don’t have the landlord’s permission to destroy our home, even if we should want to, for short term profit! Rashi explains : Your eye shall not be evil towards it  for it is not yours.  Ibn Ezra Explains: The word tzemitut is similar¹⁰⁵In meaning. To keritut (divorcement) The ⁷From the root tzadi, mem, tav. (will cut them off) it is a hyperlink to psalm 94: That G!d  will cut them off

Ramban Explains: By way of the Truth,(Kaballa) the meaning of the expression for the Land is Mine is like and they take ‘unto Me’ an offering.¹⁸⁸Exodus 25:2…for the Jubilee will apply in the world – not only in the land of Israel

Throughout the land that you hold, you must provide for the redemption of the land.

In another connection between humans and the land, just as we redeem captives, we must redeem land.

Human ownership of land is an illusion. If we love our children, we will educate ourselves into being stewards of the land: ovdah v’shamra, to serve and to guard Shechinah whose presence is b’chol ha arets.  Because the land is G!d’s, not ours

The land needs to breathe and we need to rest and breathe too on Shabbat, If we ignore these commands, R Arthur Waskow reminds us, that in the Next parashah, Behukotai, we pay the price, the land will simply demand and take her Sabbaths, at our expense.  With the hope that these truths can set us free: keratem Dror b’artzecha: and may we be strong: Chazak Chazak v’nitchazek