Miryam's Space

I am teaching a brief series about psalms. Psalms address their voice to the Holy One of blessing, they are rhythmic and use parallel repeats. They are perhaps the most widely read, and beloved book of the Tanach (Bible). I have challenged (optional) the learners to create a personal psalm to use in prayer. One of the events of this double reading, is that Miriam Moses and Aaron’s sister dies- in the wilderness. The very next thing that happens is that the community is out of water! SOURCES HERE

The water that is missing are the tears. There is no public ceremony, no tears recorded shed by her Brothers, or the community. Rashi writes that a magic well of water followed the Israelites during their wanderings. With her gone, so was the well. Torah is akin to water, and tears are healing. My experience is that you can’t go around grief, only through it. In the ancient Temple in Jerusalem there were bottles for tears – a lacrimatory The more tears, the more the respect and affection for the departed. These bottles were placed in the grave. We are mostly made of water, that weird and wonderful chemical, whose “stickiness” (think wet) makes life possible. Water is life! Even the name “Miryam” (spelled as the Hebrew sounds and is spelled) contains the word “yam” meaning sea. Miryam rescues her brother from the Nile, leads in song as the free crossed the sea of reeds – her life is linked with water. In this week’s reading, Chukat/Balak, Miriam dies, and the light that shone when she announced Moshe’s (Moses’) birth was dark. Yet no tears are shed- his heart is hard. This leads to the disaster of Moshe hitting a rock to bring water for the thirsty people, and calling them Marim-rebels. Moshe was supposed to speaking to the rock. As a result, he dies by the “kiss of the Holy One” at age 120 before reaching the promised land. I suggested that his inability to properly mourn Miryam’s loss led to his anger

I am learning with students about psalms. I have rewritten a poem about my own blocked tears and tears rediscovered. to fit the psalms, I share it here

A Psalm, dedicated to my students

Yah, my God, you filled me with life force

I am filled and strong against life’s storms

You brought me to this world and I am grateful for my life

But when the music of my small world

turned to screams, smacks and strife

This little girl you made built a wall so tall

And pretended that All was ok.

But the funny thing was,

Tears would stream down her face.

In a sad story or tale

Yet In the face of her own losses, tears refused to fall

The wall refused to come undone.

Until choice and challenge opened a path of grace

Bringing her face to face with the hurt child inside

Then she finally shed tears for those long gone from her side

And finally reach out for those souls who no longer did abide

who left a hole within her life.

Healing me with the beauty of their presence

After a lifetime my heart broke and was made whole.

Oh Holy One, now I can praise you with all my soul,

Tears have freed me

I am grateful overflowing for my wonderful, mixed life bowl.